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I was at our community pool with my five children when I ran into an old acquaintance I had not seen in a couple of years. My eldest daughter and her little girl were in first grade together, back before our two adopted daughters had made it home from Haiti . We took a few minutes to catch up and for me to introduce her to my girls and then we said our good-byes and she began to walk away.
Then, she stopped and returned to where I was. The woman, who is African American, said, "I just want to compliment you about your daughters' hair. It looks really cute. You know, so many times when white people adopt a black child, they don't learn how to care for the child's hair and it just looks crazy!"
Her voice was laced with concern as she continued.
"I know a family who adopted their daughter as a baby and I promise you, I don't think that child's hair has been combed out in the last 12 years."
I once heard an African American woman state that in her culture when a child is seen with hair that is unkempt it says to the world that the child is not receiving proper care. Over and over as I have read the stories of adult transracially adopted children, I have heard them say that their parent's inability to care for their hair was painful and made it more difficult for them to be at home among their black peers.
Hair Matters. It is absolutely essential that non-African-Amerian people understand this before they adopt a child of color.
Our family is so blessed to belong to a church that is racially diverse. I understand that there are many white parents rearing black children who struggle to find diversity in their friendships, and therefore have no idea really where to begin when it comes to issues that are unique to the black experience. That is why I am going to begin sharing the wealth.
This article is the first of a series on African hair care. We will begin with the basics and work our way up to more complex styles. So, join me each month as we make our babies shine!
Basic Hair Care Part 1: Braid Removal & Combing
Supplies Needed:
1. Spray bottle full of water
2. Detangling conditioner
3. Rat tail comb
4. Wide tooth comb
5. Pair of sharp scissors with a fine point
6. Hair clips.
With your daughter in front of you, take the first braid in your hand and carefully remove the elastic band that secures the braid by clipping it with the scissors. This is much easier on the hair than attempting to pull the elastic free which minimizes hair breakage.
Spray the braid with water, which will act as a lubricant.
I should note here that not all stylists wet the hair; it is a matter of preferance. It also should be noted that there is a great deal of variance in African hair as to texture which is why one person's hair might respond to one product (or water) better than another. I have found that with my daughters it helps to wet the braid before removal.
The need for moisture in African hair is universal and most it is common to have a good detangler on hand. Once a friend  told me that when she decided to do away with her locks she was able to actually unlock them with detangler, water, and a lot of patience.
Apply a small amount of detangling conditioner to the braid to ease removal.
Start at the end of the braid and use the pointed end of the rat tail comb to work the braid free a little at a time, stopping  as needed to loosen any tangles with your fingers. Another friend of mine uses the top most tooth in a wide tooth comb for the same purpose. Either method will help loosen the braid.
Once the braid is completely unwound, comb through with the wide tooth comb and then secure at the top of the child's  head with the clip so that it does not become tangled again. It is very helpful to always comb through the hair one section at a time and then secure the completed section with a clip before beginning another.
*Double click on photos for larger views.
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